


You’re the only one who’s allowed to take my heart

by taeyong (yuraxchan)



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: M/M, With A Twist, i hope y'all be able to choose who you want to be, it turned out more angsty that i thought, offscreen OC character death, shitty beliefs, small TW for death talk and grieving, soulmates!au, who you want to love, who you want to spend your life with
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-27
Updated: 2017-01-27
Packaged: 2018-09-20 07:22:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,243
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9480941
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yuraxchan/pseuds/taeyong
Summary: Taeil swore he would always make sure Taeyong would be so fucking happy he would forget about the whole world and focus only on him, on them, and if that entailed tattooing each other’s name on their skin to make it real then so be it. He would do it. He would do everything for Taeyong. As his chosen soulmate.





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [koshitsu_kamira](https://archiveofourown.org/users/koshitsu_kamira/gifts).



> Title taken from Limitless. Happy new lunar year!
> 
>  
> 
> [Translated in Russian by Олег Несерьезный and woof-woof](https://ficbook.net/readfic/5470006)

“I’m sorry,” his mom said softly, tightening her grip on his small frame. “You’re too young to experience heartbreak.”

Taeyong snuggled against her in reply, a little confused about what she meant. He only knew that something bad had happened to him, his mom’s expression of pure horror was enough proof for Taeyong to understand that his life would take a turn for the worst.

“You have to be strong, baby.” his mom added seriously, petting his hair as he nodded to reassure her. For what, he didn’t know. He just thought he had to.

What if the tattoo on his tiny wrist disappeared? It wasn’t a big deal for him. He didn’t even know why it was there in the first place. He just shrugged it off when one day the black ink was nowhere to be seen. 

In reality, Taeyong was too young to mourn the loss of someone he haven’t even met. How could he miss someone who was never in his life? Someone he couldn’t imagine because he didn’t know their face or their name? How could he feel heartbreak, pain, or grief? He just couldn’t. 

At 9 Taeyong naively thought that it would be okay-- that _ he _ would be okay. 

But as he grew up, he came to the realization that what he thought was nothing would affect his whole life. The tattoo he started to forget came back to haunt him in his sleep when he turned eighteen, his parents finally ready to explain to him why he was  _ different _ from his friends, from his whole family, and why the skin on his wrist was unblemished.

Soulmates. 

Apparently everyone had one. Unless you know, _ they died _ . 

Taeyong didn’t feel loss at eighteen either, hugging his mom as _ she _ cried for him. For them--his deceased soulmate and he. “I’ll be fine,” he mumbled, wiping her tears away. He  knew he would be fine. He just  _ knew _ .

Nothing was ever the same after that. Year after year, Taeyong saw his friends meet their soulmate and be ridiculously happy (and sappy) together, then start a family while he was left behind with no one to share his life with. Ever. Or so everyone around him thought.

Taeyong tried not to feel bitter or jealous, because it was no one’s fault that his soulmate died before they could even meet. He sometimes wondered if it was for the better or the worst that they didn’t get to meet each other at least once. But he prefered not to think about it too much.

Mourning a mirage was weird. Taeyong didn’t want to cry for the idea of someone he should have spent his lifetime with. He didn’t want to spend his whole life being unhappy about it either, about  _ what ifs _ \--what if we met, what if we were fated, what if we lo- He  _ wouldn’t. _ He refused to let it get to him. He refused to let it break him. He refused to let them all destroy him, choking him with their pity until he felt hopeless and helpless and  _ dying _ . Taeyong didn’t want to be dying before he even got to _ live _ . Not for someone who had never ever been in his life anyway. Not for a few _ letters  _ inked on his wrist. Letters he didn’t even remember. Letters his young self chose to forget--probably for a reason. 

Letters couldn’t define him or his fate. No one but  _ him _ could decide what his life would be, who he would be, who he would be with, who he would  _ love _ , who he would spend a lifetime with. 

So he did what he thought was best for him: he ran away. 

 

 

  
“You sure you don’t want pizza?” Taeil asked for the unpteenth time, blinking up at him cutely. 

Huffing, Taeyong nodded very seriously. “I’m very sure.” 

“You’re no fun, you healthy creep.” his boyfriend pouted, wiggling his toes against his thigh. Taeyong grabbed his socked feet and squeezed them once, sending him a warm smile. Taeil’s eyes softened and he sighed dramatically. “Fine. Let’s eat your homemade salad.” he said dryly, grimacing at the word.

Beaming, Taeyong leaned down to steal him a kiss. He didn’t count on his boyfriend grabbing him by the shirt and pulling him down on him though. Taeil cackled against his lips, circling his arms around his neck when Taeyong feel forward. 

“You, evil thing.” Taeyong snorted, narrowing his eyes at him. 

Taeil smirked. “You know you love me.”

“Of course I do,” the younger rolled his eyes. “But if you want to eat tonight you should let me go.”

Nuzzling Taeyong’s cheek, Taeil nipped at his jaw. “I’m never letting you go.” he replied seriously before grinning childishly. “I’m not that hungry anyway.”

Arching one eyebrow, Taeyong let out a long suffering sigh and wiggled on Taeil’s body, making himself comfortable since his boyfriend didn’t seem ready to let him go. Taeil hissed as an elbow hit his rib but he didn’t complain, content of having Taeyong in his arms. 

Grinning, Taeil then reached for Taeyong’s hand resting on his shoulder and rubbed his cheek on his head, thumbing his pulse lovingly. Taeyong tensed up slightly at the touch--as he always did really, holding his breath before relaxing quickly as if Taeil wouldn’t notice. It was always like a knee jerk reaction for the younger and it made Taeil’s heart clench, knowing that if he didn’t know any better he would have missed it or thought he imagined it. 

He knew though, he  _ knew _ . But he wished Taeyong would stop feeling guilty about not grieving his deceased soulmate all his life like he was supposed to. Like  _ they _ expected he would. He wished Taeyong wouldn’t feel guilty about moving on, about letting Taeil love him instead of spending a lifetime without loving anyone or anyone loving him. Taeyong shouldn’t feel guilty to be alive. He didn’t choose to lose his soulmate, heck, it wasn’t like he killed them after all. He didn’t even know them for christ’s sake.  

Taeil gently pulled his boyfriend’s wrist to his lips and kissed it softly. “You know, we could be each other’s soulmate.” 

Taeyong lifted his head, surprised. “What?” 

Taeil shrugged, eyeing his own naked wrist. “We could just tattoo each other’s name on our wrist.”

“You would do that?” the  _ for me _ was left unsaid but Taeil heard it anyway. “You would want that?” Taeyong breathed out, his voice trembling with emotion. 

“You’re already mine,” Taeil said truthfully. “You’re already my soulmate. I  _ know _ it.”

“Then why…” Taeyong trailed off, confused.

“I could prove it to the world.” Taeil smiled, pressing a kiss to his nose. “You would be _ officially  _ mine.” No one would know you weren’t supposed to be mine, that I _ stole _ you, he thought inwardly.

Taeyong chuckled, cupping his face and kissing him soundly. “You’re crazy.  _ We’re _ crazy.” He kept smiling though, biting his lower lip bashfully. His eyes were bright and shining and he was so beautiful that Taeil fell in love all over again. 

Taeyong should always be this happy. Taeil swore he would always make sure Taeyong would be so fucking happy he would forget about the whole world and focus only on him, on them, and if that entailed tattooing each other’s name on their skin to make it real then so be it. He would do it. He would do everything for Taeyong. As his _ chosen soulmate _ .

 


End file.
